7 Signs of Emotionally Manipulative People
Learn the signs of a manipulator, and how to deal with them.
As explained by Dr. Mariyam Ahmed to Global News, emotional manipulation is when someone tries to manage the emotions of another person, or exert influence over someone else’s behaviour for self-serving purposes.
We all have seen this in different forms, and might even have an experience with emotional manipulation ourselves.
I’ve seen this in relationships, sadly, more than a few times. It’s always the other half twisting up stories to make the other person feel bad for something he/she didn’t do — ring a bell, anyone?
It’s a common household guest too; parents manipulate their children to do something they want instead of asking if that’s what the children want. If you don’t know what I’m talking about then good for you, and if you think asking children what they want to do is wrong or considered “babying” them, I feel sad for your kids.
What about the friends who take advantage of your insecurities? Yea, put them in the same box.
I promote healthy emotional and mental health on this little blog and want you to know how to spot emotionally manipulative people.
Here are 7 signs of emotionally manipulative people:
1. Twisting everything you say/do
Have you ever dealt with someone, who no matter how hard you try, everything you say, is wrong for them? Or matter how hard you explain yourself, there’s always something that person can twist to make you feel bad?
You can refuse to play with their little mind games and lies. Some people are great manipulators, they treat you badly and somehow it’s your fault. Don’t fall for them, it’s just what they do.
2. They take you on guilt trips
Guilt-tripping is a manipulation tactic used as an incentive to make a person do or say something that person wouldn’t normally do or say.
This is often used when asking favors. If you say no and they make you feel guilty about it, take a closer look.
3. Their actions never match their words
Emotional manipulators are often skilled at lying. They would always say what you want to hear but their actions would never catch up. They would always say that they support you but it never really shows.
4. Using your insecurities against you
Manipulators are experts in using your weaknesses against you. For example, when dealing with doubts and insecurities, some people will try to make you feel like a burden but will help you anyway to butter up their ego.
Everyone has insecurities, nobody has the right to use yours against you.
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5. They’re always the victim
Emotional manipulators don’t take accountability for anything. For some reason, they always have someone to point to when they do something wrong. It may or may not be you but you certainly don’t want to be involved with this type of people.
6. They always have it much worse than you
Sharing your problems? Oh, they always have one that’s much much worse than yours. Their situations and problems are always much worse than anyone and everyone needs to hear them.
They undermine everyone else’s problems and they’re good at making others feel like their problems are small compared to theirs.
Watch out.
7. Uses flirting as a manipulation tool
I saved the kind of people that irks me the most for last — the flirt. These people use flirting to get what they want in life. They would absolutely tell you anything you want to hear but no mistake, they give zero fudge about your feelings.
To be able to maintain a safe distance from emotional manipulators, it requires awareness on our part; we can’t spot them if we don’t know what to spot.
I get that sometimes there’s no way out of dealing with emotional manipulators, and that sometimes they’re your colleague, long-time friend, or even a part of your family, but you can always set boundaries; put a fence in between.
Don’t be afraid to cut off people who’ve been emotionally manipulating you, your mental health is more important.
Emotional manipulators will always try to suck your light away — don’t let them.
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent “ — Eleanor Roosevelt
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